1115 On my third beer. Yes, now I feel bored here in Brussels but I would sure as hell feel even more bored back in London. Alternatively, draw out another 50-75, do something with Leyla; at least then I’ve some big memory from the holiday, because really I have done nothing, and returning have no memories to take home AT ALL.
It was silly. If I’d known Leyla was going to be at Fifth Avenue when I got there, I could have got there sooner, when I was not so drunk, done something with her, and still had time to come back and catch my Eurostar home. Now I’ve been “forced to” spend another £80 on hotel and £132 on Eurostar and now do not HAVE any money to do anything with Leyla! Oh if I really wanted to I could take out another 50-75 euros from the cash machine, but I do not want to. Now I feel in lockdown mood. I have spent too much, and now I just want to curl myself up like a ball.
Don’t know what I’m going to do today. Just thinking about food really. 1045 On my first beer. 127 euros to last me today and tomorrow morning. I would not be feeling down now if I had lots of money to spare.; it is only my financial situation that depresses me. Leyla did turn me on last night; that is why I don’t want to see her again today. I cannot afford to do anything—not having just spent an extra £133 on Eurostar and another £80 on my hotel. Blue skies this morning but as it did every day on this trip, rain and snow should start after 1pm or so.