My four year battle for —– turned into a psychodrama between the two of us which in its own way became highly addictive and in a masochistic kind of way pleasurable

My four year battle for —– turned into a psychodrama between the two of us, which in its own way became highly addictive, and in a masochistic kind of way, pleasurable. Before that, my feelings for her, initially not bothered either way, had been growing almost undetected inside me like “a slow burning fuse nearing its moment of detonation”. No one was more surprised than me when I realised I loved her, and could not live without her.