I went for the smaller cans of Jupiler today, 33cl. Those 50cl cans yesterday were hard work

I went for the smaller cans of Jupiler today, 33cl. Those 50cl cans yesterday were hard work. 1 euro each from shop instead of 2 euros each from hotel machine. All I did yesterday was go briefly to Cine Paris and then Fifth Avenue, didn’t do anything naughty in particular, and yet still seem to have got through 121 euros. The old pervert was back in the Cine Paris. Pathetically hanging around for anyone to fumble with. He was hovering in the reception area when I arrived and as soon as I went in to stand at the back in the dark he followed me in and stood next to me. I went upstairs, he followed me upstairs; I came back down and sat down in the dark. He followed me & found me in the dark & sat next to me. Twice I moved and twice he followed and sat down next to me but then—an unusual event, out of nowhere I noticed there was a young woman in the row a few in front of me, with her top lifted and letting men touch her bosoms, while she played with their members. She came to me but only spoke Italian and French, but was trying to get me to give her money to do something with her and her “companion”, the man she had come in with. I kept saying no but she just shrugged and carried on handling me regardless. The two of them then sat together on the sofa underneath the screen that I had never noticed before; she came back to me and now pulled her trousers down and wanted me to touch her between the legs. She was offering me various things in a language I did not understand; eventually I declined and disentangled myself from her, but gave her 10 euros for the fondle at least. She seemed happy. Italian apparently. Gabriella. I left then and made my way in a state of some arousal to Fifth Avenue where I seemed to spend the next several hours, drinking myself into some kind of oblivion. Lucy was there, and so I knew I would be staying. My god, in tiny white & blue striped top with her cleavage spilling over, small black shorts over black stockings. What a picture. She followed me to my table but after buying her a red bull I moved away; she was too desirable and…so why didn’t I just do something with her? I always feel I need to be really drunk and wild before I will have sex. In the toilets by the mirror I had another little fondle with the slim black-haired Bulgarian —–, she was kissing me with her tongue and released my member from its tense confinement. Another girl walked past laughing, “Oh, a show!” I then sat with the black Brazilian girl, the one I always smile and nod at but had never spoken to before; she has got a beautiful and KIND face, I think it would be lovely to go to a room with her. Her name escapes me but I remember it was something very beautiful; like Olympia or Ayeesha. I vaguely remember buying her a red bull as well, and I think I gave her and Lucy a 10 euro note each, more as an apology for not doing anything with them. I do recall buying a double vodka & coke and being shocked to discover it was 18 euros; I sat for a long time staring at the receipt in my hands, till the manager Victor came over and explained I had had a “DOUBLE double vodka, doppel doppel”. I must have looked shocked. A McDonald’s which I must have paid for with the 100 euro note in my pocket as I see he gave me 94 euros change.

I can’t write Vienna off until I have been to the two best porn kinos

I can’t write Vienna off until I have been to the two best porn kinos, because porn kinos are the glory of Vienna for me. Just the memory of those 4 so sexy girls in Brussels on Wednesday night is overshadowing everything. I will have to work hard and be lucky in Vienna to find anything to compete with them. So, another beer. Strength, adventurer! Courage!

So what of Saturday? Got the No.6 tram down to Fortuna

So, what of Saturday? Got the No.6 tram down to Fortuna. Once again two high quality films. Drunk Sex Orgy and the start of a Gabriel Pontello film (Fatzenschaft?) but no “hostesses”. Back up to Burgasse Peep. The kabin films are better than I gave them credit for (and I already had 36 euros on my card so I did not have to spend anything) but the peep girls I saw were poor, all skinny. Left quite quickly as I was hungry. Roll & pizza from station, then, crazily, a 200g steak down in the restaurant. They a new steak menu and it is better than before. I had to force myself to finish it, however, I was stuffed. Tried to sleep then but couldn’t, so had a couple of beers from minibar then up to WSK. Once again two excellent high quality films and Trekki there too. I declined her charms this time because I wanted to save it for Angelique and Manhattan bar. Angelique—really three bars in one, Large Angelique, Small Angelique and Alm Bar—Lilly was on holiday but her friend Sylvia was stunning. I resisted, even at 100 euros for half an hour, and headed on down in the rain to Manhattan. Busy with men, the whole time I was there, a lot of them Syrian looking (Westbahnhof was packed with them, it is like a refugee camp at night), and SEVERAL beautiful girls, Melissa and Andra I know from before, but a new blonde Adelina. The problem is DECIDING which one you want, and I could not, so just drink and drink then stumbled back to my hotel about 2 I think. Melissa for big breasts, Andra for big bottom, Adelina neither breasts or arse as big as the others but a little of both.

20:00 I arrive in the Café Westend. WSK has a new star

20:00 I arrive in the Café Westend. WSK has a new star, Trekki, from Slovenia but born in Vienna. She was the only girl on duty, but the WSK was busier than I’ve known it for a long time, which I don’t think was a coincidence. I wait service. The piano player is playing. No waiters coming anywhere near me. I need a drink. 20:04 and still waiting. God knows what the piano player is playing; I doubt even he knows. Ottakring, 1837. My first day in Vienna flew by like it never happened. Few beers in hotel bar, WSK, Café Westend, then no doubt I will be sleeping like a log.
WSK

How I miss the old Cine ABC with its hourly stripper. It didn’t matter how pretty or not she was

How I miss the old Cine ABC, with its hourly stripper. It didn’t matter how pretty or not she was, the sense of rising excitement and tension as the clock ticked up to the hour mark again was palpable, your mouth started to go dry, your heart started to beat faster, as you sat there masturbating to the images on the screen, you knew any minute now a real life girl was going to be stripping on stage for you, real life bosoms and real life buttocks and real life pussies, and you could carry on stroking your naked member in front of her, as she eyed your swollen cocks with either amusement or contempt; it is like that moment in Salome at the opera when you know you are approaching the moment of the Dance of the Seven Veils, or that moment in Last Tango in Paris where you know Marlon Brando is about to suddenly pick Maria Schneider up and rip her knickers off with an audible tear; it is that animal lust. Still it stands an empty husk, as is the old California peep show and kabins next to it. They have not still been replaced by anything. They are two dead parts of town next to each other; all the lust that used to exist in those places, the excitement, the racing heartbeats, the orgasms perpetually put off or released, the wankings, the suckings, the fuckings, the visual pleasure, the sexual pleasure. Now two dead empty shells.
cine abc

I reckon if I owned a strip club or a porn kino

I reckon if I owned a strip club or a porn kino (preferably both together under one roof), it would be the best strip club/porn kino in the world. Most of these places don’t have a clue what is really sexy (i.e. they don’t share my taste). But, I have to say, the manager here at 5th Avenue (Viktor?) has set up his place quite perfectly. The best bar of its type I have ever found. And so popular with the locals, so appreciated by locals.

Cine Paris was quite busy again

Cine Paris was quite busy again, and the films are good, but I must admit I am growing quite bored of the near exclusive Marc Dorcel diet. You see the same actors & actresses all the time. I like Anna Polina but not in every film. The beautiful big girl was in 5th Avenue again. I was very tempted, but the Irish Breakfast actually made me feel quite flat. Eating always ruins my drinking.

I left 5th Avenue without doing anything

I left 5th Avenue without doing anything; but that place is ridiculous. There were at least 7 girls who I would like to have gone with. Instead, I come back to Brussels Grill—not the Rogier Brussels Grill. That is the busiest restaurant I have ever been to; you are not allowed to choose your seat, you basically are slotted in where they tell you. Instead, I walk a bit further and come to the Brouckere Brussels Grill—quieter, and smaller, and always empty. So peaceful. My god, 5th Avenue. So many incredible girls. I miss Mon Cheri and Golden Gate in Berlin, and Pour Platin in Vienna, but 5th Avenue is better than all of them put together to be honest. Cine Paris was busier than I’ve ever known it. Maybe 10 gentlemen in the downstairs kino, another 5 or so upstairs, 3 more hanging around the toilets. Two fantastic films, and a pervert sat next to me and was wanking me; first time for a long long time that has happened. I left him downstairs but he followed me upstairs and carried on.

I finally made it to the Butterfly House

I finally made it to the Butterfly House. Very nice to be back there; then on to the KHM. From there to Fortuna, the same two black-haired girls as last time; the one who did not speak to me last time came to me this time; a very sexy black-haired Spanish girl. I resisted the temptation. My visits to kinos are often ruined by being too drunk and insensitive; this time if anything I had sobered up too much and was too sensitised and had to hold myself back. Quite a good film but it went on for ever. Monique Covet. I was waiting for the next film to start (Yacht Party 2) but had to give up in the end. I didn’t want to be too late to get to the Gurtel tonight.

butterfly house (1) butterfly house (5) butterfly house (4) butterfly house (3)

Yes Cine Paris has been quite poor again

Yes, Cine Paris has been quite poor again, but oh it is still a lovely place to doze in when you’ve had a drink. Yes, 5th Avenue now bores me a little but oh if you are going to drink where better to drink than in a bar filled with beautiful whores. If this time I have not desired any of them enough to sleep with them then that too is fantastic, as it saves me money for Munich & Nuremberg to come.

The Cine Paris films have been a bit rubbish this time

The Cine Paris films have been a bit rubbish this time but still a lovely luxurious place to crash out in and snooze and relax, away from the world. Leaving there and heading to 5th Avenue I was stopped by a black girl with the most enormous bosoms. I was sorely tempted but pressed on to 5th. Nothing there took my fancy and I headed back, via Rue des Commerçants street girls, and Brussels Grill, to the hotel.

Quite similarly men (consenting f—king adults) in the privacy of an adult cinema are not allowed to masturbate

Quite similarly, men (consenting f—king adults) in the privacy of an adult cinema are not allowed to masturbate themselves or masturbate the man next to them. Oh, why? Exactly? To bring a little bit of pleasure into their own life, and into the life of the person next to them? Why is this banned? You want us to live our lives completely without pleasure, is that it? Any pleasure that we plebs may enjoy is such a disgrace and threat and anathema to you. Honestly, what will happen if TWO girls dance together? They might touch each other. And? What will go wrong if they touch each other? It is so completely brainless and disgusting and yet we meekly and politely acquiesce in this puritanical takeover of our rich, vibrant lives. They steal that naughtiness, that vibrancy from us, and turn us into banal, mundane, frigidity. And we let them do it. As De Sade says, if there is to be a revolution it must first be a sexual revolution.

It is just one small sign of how shit London is

It is just one small sign of how shit London is that strip clubs are not allowed to have 2 girls dancing on stage at the same time anymore, it has to be only one. What on earth is the danger they are frightened of if 2 girls (or more) are dancing at the same time? Some faux-lesbian action? And what exactly would happen if that occurred? It is so so so asinine. What is it exactly that the councils are so frightened of? So you come to Vienna and there are girls in every adult cinema ready to blow you and f—k you, and do you know what, Austrian civilisation does not collapse. Life goes on, happily, calmly, with graciousness and civility. So what exactly is the reason for banning TWO girls dancing on stage at the same time? Oh, London, what a shithole you have become.

I drank 1 small and 3 large Zipfers in the bar then just missed a No.6 to Fortuna Kino

I drank 1 small and 3 large Zipfers in the bar then just missed a No.6 to Fortuna Kino so went down and got the U3 to Wahringer Straße. Walked round and round and could not find the cinema for ages. With my head in my map I managed to tread in/more sort of kick a pile of dog shit. I thought ‘so this is how this trip to Vienna is going to be is it?’ An absolute sense of panic gripped me. The first time I emerge from my hotel to begin my holiday in Vienna and I cannot even find the first place I am looking for, I was walking round & round the Wahringer Straße station and I cannot work out which side is left or right, or north or south, and I am panicking more & more, a sense of hysteria taking me over, and now I have got dog shit all over my left shoe. Finally I found it and got in and it was totally different from what I remembered! Four rooms all off of one corridor, so weird. One stark naked young guy lying back on sofa just wanking the whole time. Left and got back on the U and coming back down in bewilderment, distressed that my holiday had gone so wrong so quickly, I saw the cinema I was looking for at Josefstadter Straße! Idiot. I went to the wrong one. All last year I was saying I must go back to Wahringer Kino and it turns out I was thinking of Josefstadter Kino, Weltspiegel, and had in fact never been to Wahringer Kino before in my life. Went in this one, Weltspiegel, and sure enough there were the 3 black-haired handmaidens I remember from before. I got properly turned on watching the film, touched her breasts as she explained the prices. I came out and walked down the road with an erection as it started to get a bit dark. Went in Erotic Peep Show. No kabins open! Big girl on stage in peep show, I ——- while watching her for 4 euros. Carried on walking down the road with an erection. Passed so many places, I wonder how many of them are actually trading still. Got No.6 then to Fortuna. Film new but not great, the huge breast blonde old woman came in and we went to the back, and ———————. Amazing I actually got turned on enough to finish! That says something. Different from last time anyway. Obviously feeling totally down and empty now dragged myself back to the hotel just wanting to be indoors. Had 1 small beer in the Dorint bar with the same barmaid as last time but now bigger and blonder, then went back out and tried a zwiebelrostbraten in the corner restaurant. Pretty awful. Service was so surly and cold. Steak was the most pale thin anaemic thing I had ever seen. It was tasty enough and filled me up but I will not go back there again! Maybe I will find somewhere in Burggasse.
dorint hotel room

Thank goodness Cine Paris still survives at least

Thank goodness Cine Paris still survives at least—though one wonders how can it, and for how much longer can it fight against the tide? It is always near empty when I go, myself and 2 or 3 other customers spread over the two large rooms. The two rooms are beautifully refurbished, it is the most luxurious adult cinema I have ever known, and the films are all high quality French porn—not the grim, nasty American porn that is rammed down our throat in England. I think if a London cinema set itself up as a European cinema, they would do much better.

Considering how much I drank yesterday I was surprised I had a completely undisturbed sleep

Considering how much I drank yesterday, I was surprised I had a completely undisturbed sleep and woke up with no feeling of hangover at all. I think the excitement of being in another city enables me to drink much more without bad effects. I vaguely remember enjoying the Paris films and revelling in the sense of exhibitionism and abandonment; I was getting up from my seat to walk from one room to the other with my naked cock out of my trousers, a very pleasurable feeling (I put it away before going through the lobby where the staff sat of course). It has been a grey but humid day: quite breezy, too. I got two cardigans for the w–e, and enjoyed my visit to the Magritte and Old Masters Museums. A little Magritte goes a long way with me but the overwhelming impression was how much he loved his wife, Georgette. She is everywhere in the paintings, and photographs and films.
magritte-con-su-mujer-georgette

So no I did not manage to crack the Vienna nut

So no, I did not manage to crack the Vienna nut, and never will now. There feels nothing here for me. I have not found even one, or two places, to make me feel at home here. The hotel meal was poor and the Augustinerkeller meal was even worse. A relief to grab a McDonald’s from Westbahnhof on my way back tonight. I did manage to find my way to Fortuna Kino in Favoritenstraße. At last, a good old-fashioned adult cinema, and a good Italian film. I think Italian pornography is the best. At last, finally, I managed to sustain a full erection. It took me three nights to even manage a proper erection—that says it all. The Gurtel was meant to be the biggest red light district in Vienna, and back in the snow in 2005 I came down it and was going in one club after another, they never seemed to end. And to find the only place where I slept with a girl in Vienna totally gone, an empty lot where it used to be, was particularly disspiriting, and is really a great symbol of how pointless this trip now feels. As much as I love this hotel, I will never come to Vienna again. Good riddance, they cry!

It has been a very long time since I’ve been as turned on as I was in the Ciné Paris today; especially when the old man twice touched me

It has been a very long time since I’ve been as turned on as I was in the Ciné Paris today; especially when the old man twice touched me. It has given this holiday a nice encouraging end. Christ, I’m ugly; I keep catching my reflection in the mirror behind the bar. There is a mirror all behind the bar which reinforces my first impression, that she is like Manet’s Girl at the Folies Bergere. These are what I live for, these little moments when I feel so turned on. That is what I spend hundreds of pounds travelling for. That is what I run up thousands of pounds of debt for. So the kino in Rosa Luxemburg Straße and the Ciné Paris in Brussels were real discoveries on this holiday.

So the best memories of this trip—the Nadine Jansen films in Rosa Luxemburg kino and the Ciné Paris

So the best memories of this trip—the Nadine Jansen films in Rosa Luxemburg kino, and the Ciné Paris. That says it all. He just sits there slapping that fruit machine button like a retard. I will return to Soho Cinema at the first opportunity, and check out Alex, Vanessa, and Katy. I have three days more off in London. The boyfriend might even be the manager. He certainly takes a quite proprietorial attitude to the place, and to her. Still the slap-slap-slap. Does he do this from opening time to closing time? This bar would be absolutely lovely without that —— at the machines. The other best memories are the new paintings I saw in the Berlinische and the Brohan Museums.

Not wanting to go back to the Ibis bar while killing an hour or so before my Eurostar home I wandered down Avenue Fonsny

Not wanting to go back to the Ibis bar while killing an hour or so before my Eurostar home, I wandered down Avenue Fonsny and found this charming bar on the next corner, full of great ferns, and art nouveau posters and fabulous black & red walls—and the most gorgeous blonde ponytail barmaid. Like a Belgian Lotta, in tight green wool sweater and blue jeans over voluptuous bottom. On my last day in Brussels, I found Maes Corner closed, and in fact almost every shop in Brussels, too—is Day of the Dead a holiday here? I had two in O’Reilly’s, walked past the Metropole and the Cheese Café, found the Dome Café also closed, then after one in some tiny sidestreet bar, and after much deliberation, I returned to Ciné Paris. The two rooms are big and clean, the seats very new and comfortable, the screens big and the picture perfect—quite the nicest kino I have been in. The French porn films are high quality, and I found myself becoming highly aroused. When a very old man sat down next to me and tried twice to touch me, I had to knock his hand away both times not because I did not want it, but his touch brought me to the edge of glory both times. He left, disappointed, though I did not want him to. I think I could easily make a home here in the Paris. It was the most erotic moment of the whole trip, far more than anything with Angelica in Club 77 or Christina in Brussels. I am ready to have hands on me again. I think the barmaid’s boyfriend is at the fruit machine, she goes back to him whenever not busy. After a day of blazing blue skies, I was shocked to come out of the cinema, quivering, taking time to compose myself in the alleyway, to find it was raining! I take this as omen that I had at last found my answer in this holiday—it is back in the cinemas. I returned to Gare du Midi happy, feeling warm pleasure in my loins, and now pass the time here in the Café Hotel.

In a porn cinema the dividing line between gay and straight blurs and it is very dark in there as well

In a porn cinema the dividing line between gay and straight blurs, and it is very dark in there as well; this is something “normal” people don’t understand. How in that intensely sexualised environment, when you are so so aroused it does not matter whose hand is on your cock, male or female, or whose mouth. This does not mean you are gay. I even once went to a several hours long appointment at a psychiatric hospital, and they finally concluded that they thought I was homosexual, because I seemed quite “effeminate”. I finished with the psychiatric profession on that day and knew I had to make it on my own—but that meant devoting myself to Tallulah and Esmeralda for good, and not looking back.
Brussels Oct 2011 (16)